


Thank You For Staying With Me

by a_beautiful_angeltf



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Childhood Friends, Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Feel-good, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Light Angst, M/M, My First Fanfic, POV Kozume Kenma, im crying I don’t even know what I’m writing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:28:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27473536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_beautiful_angeltf/pseuds/a_beautiful_angeltf
Summary: In which Kenma discovers a deeper realization in the same things that happen every day.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 14
Kudos: 26





	1. A Prologue  Of Sorts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LilacBonbon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilacBonbon/gifts).



> Ah hello there. I am highly, extremely,VERY nervous about how this will turn out. It’s only because of an amazing friend I made recently that I’m even putting this here-
> 
> I hope ya enjoy my first Haikyuu fic~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Simply the beginning of a friendship that we all know by heart now

Often quiet and distant from others, Kenma Kozume never spent much time socializing with others. To be quite sincere, the thought of having to interact with a human being unnerved him quite a bit. His social anxiety prevented him from being able to even be outside so he took to playing video games all the time. The mere idea of being in public made his hands tremble and caused his breathing to worsen. Videogames were the only thing able to bring him back to normal. They became his lifeline, the one thing tethering his sanity. With a console in his hand, Kenma had crafted a perfected little bubble of security that he could use in the real world without fear. He felt content. He felt protected. He felt safe. Safe from all of the whispers and eyes that seem to follow him everywhere. He felt as if he was all he would ever need. Then came Kuroo.

As if it wasn't possible, Kuroo was really more anxious than Kenma. The first time they met, Kuroo clung to his father's leg as if it was his lifeline and could barely stick his head any further than beyond the pantline. His absurd hair hid his panicked filled eyes as they shot across the room but Kenma felt strange sort of pull towards him. Something about the boy sparked a little flame in Kenna’s heart and he could’ve swore he stopped breathing for a second. He physically shook his head as if it would get rid of the strange sensation and invited him up to his room.

When he pushed open the door, game disks and console laid scattered across the floor. The bed was in a serious state of disarray and the blinds that covered the windows were drawn shut and tight. Slightly panicking inside Kenma turned around to tell Kuroo to leave so he could tidy up but stopped short at the look of awe and interest that clouded his eyes. Kuroo stepped further into the room, his eyes surveying and studying the names on each disk and stood in the middle. A strange silence settled over the two as one waited for the other to break the quiet.

“You like video games?” A small voice quietly spoke out. Kenma looked up to see Kuroo looking straight at him, the question in the air. 

“I- um yeah I do. Would you like to play some?” Kenma offered, his voice wavering a bit. Kuroo unexpectedly broke out into a smile and nodded.

“Yeah I would.”

The two settled into a routine like that for a few days. Kuroo would come over and they would game for hours until it was time for dinner. Kenma felt a little guilty though that he was always doing what he wanted so after one of the games they had played that day Kenma asked a question. “Is there anything else you would like to do Kuroo?” Kuroo’s glanced up at the ceiling in thought then fell on Kenma in excitement. “Can we try volleyball?“ Just like that Kenma was brought into a sport he was sure he wouldn’t spend much time on. 

Years slowly creep by as Kenma and Kuroo become closer and closer playing the same sport he was so sure he would’ve dropped by now. He knew why he didn’t though but chose to ignore it. The reason was the same one that made him join the junior high volleyball team. After much begging on Kuroo’s part, he reluctantly agreed and Kenma swore he had never seen someone look so excited about a sport before. Watching him jump around and scream brought a tiny smile upon his face. If Kuroo was so excited about it it couldn’t be so bad right? 

He was wrong. Horribly wrong. He had to run miles, perform exercises and intense warmups that left his tiny body weak and exhausted. To add insult to injury, his ¨senpais¨ felt the need to needlessly boss him around and gave him unnecessary orders to follow. It irked Kenma to the point where he almost quit the volleyball team all together. What made them think that they could make him do whatever they wanted simply because they were born a few years before him? He hated it. He had enough of this but Kuroo came and convinced him to stay. His words of encouragement affected him more than he would like to admit so he decided to stay for a while longer.

High school makes its way around and second year Kenma is still in volleyball surprisingly. He enjoys it occasionally but still doesn't have the same drive Kuroo had all these years. All he did was the bare minimum to stay on the team but that was enough for Kuroo. All throughout middle school and high school, Kenma was picking up on a few details that further confused his heart.

Anytime they would go to a match, the same old comments and remarks fluttered around his arena from spectators and players alike. They don't really bother him as much as they should but for reasons he couldn´t understand, Kuroo always came to his defense. Seeing him do this time and time again gave Kenma´s heart an extra flutter that he tried to squash done each time.

Anytime Kuroo sent him some stupid meme it would unintentionally put a small smile on his face and he couldn't deny the rush of heat that would pop up everytime Kuroo gave him that beaming smile of him. That damned smile shook him to his very core everytime and everytime it felt Kenma in a state of confusion and embarrassment. Was there something wrong with him? Was he finally losing it being friends with Kuroo all these years? 

More questions than answers came pouring in overloading his brain and emotions then something clicked. What he was looking for was revealed to be in the days he had never expected and the moments he never thought of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Done. Written. Published and I’m crying. 
> 
> To be very honest this is my first real fanfic since like 2018 so I am still very rusty in my writing abilities. With due time I (hopefully) get better and the story will...yknow...actually be good.
> 
> I hope you all will enjoy this story (and not cringe at the more stupid things I write)


	2. The Same Morning Routine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo being Kenma's wake up call is nothing new to him really and it was the same things each and every day
> 
> So why was this time so different?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man mental breakdowns and stress can really kill a writing streak.
> 
> Never worry I am back with a (hopefully) better mental state and renewed vigor. The response I got for my last chapter blew me away honestly. I just wasn't expecting this story to gain any attention. I promise that I will do everything I can to make it enjoyable to read.
> 
> Now..Without further ado, chapter 2

To be perfectly honest, waking up early in the morning is a struggle for anyone. For Kenma it proved to be a never-ending battle as he laid wrapped in a thick blanket trying to muster the energy to get up. Even in his second year of high school, the struggle was certainly real for the catlike teen. After 30 minutes and 4 failed attempts, Kenma was just about ready to give up all hope and fall back asleep when a loud bang resonated through the house and several loud footsteps. His door flew wide open and in the doorway stood Kuroo Tetsurou, Nekoma´s captain and Kenma´s lifelong friend.

¨Come on kitten let's go. It's time for school.¨ A long groan came out from underneath the pile and Kuroo snickered. Watching Kuroo slowly make his way carefully to the bed, Kenma shifted his body so it wouldn’t be affected by the sharp tug he knew would undoubtedly come his way. Instead of the yank he was expected, a bright ray of light hit him square in the eye. Kenma hissed, distracted by the early morning sun that was now pouring through the blinds.

“Kuroo what the hell-” Head peeked out from under the covers, Kenma threw a small glare towards Kuroo who simply just shrugged and turned around to grab Kenma’s backpack and uniform.  
“Come on kitten. Time to go.” The same blinding smile made its way to Kuroo’s face and Kenma’s heart did a tiny flutter at the sight of it. Choosing to ignore it, he recently rolled out of bed and slowly shuffled his way around the foot of his bed and tugged this uniform out of Kuroo’s hands.

“Alright, you have to leave the room now Kuroo I need to get changed.”

“Alright kitten. Hurry up we don’t have much time. And don’t forget to shower!” Making his statement, Kuroo turned around and walked out of Kenma’s room, closing the door quietly behind him. Kenma sighed, the feeling of exhaustion already weighing quite heavily on him. The silence that resettled after Kuroo’s exit was calm but the violent flutter his heart gave was anything but. The warm early morning light bathed his features as his face took on a deep red hue and his whole neck flushed red. The intense reaction Kenma had in Kuroo’s absence baffled him immensely. The only thing he did was come to wake him up, the same thing he had done for years since childhood. In a haze of confusion and exhaustion, Kenma reached for his clothes and reluctantly went to begin his morning routine, the small flutter still floating around his heart.

Bag on his back and console in hand, Kenma walked out the front door to see Kuroo leaning against the pence smiling at his appearance.

“Ready to go kitten?” Eyes cast downward at the game he was playing through he gave a small nod in Kuroo’s direction. Satisfied with his response, Kuroo kicked his leg off the fence and began walking in the direction of the school, Kenma following close behind. Usually, their walks were filled with consistent rambling on Kuroo’s end with few sounds of acknowledgment coming from Kenma, the majority of his attention focused on the smooth movement from the gameplay on the console. This time however Kenma’s focus was completely thrown off-kilter by the confusing reactions he had to Kuroo’s wake-up reminder.

It was the same morning routine they had established since middle school so why was he so...affected by it? What made this morning feel different than the others? 

It took about 10 minutes for Kuroo to realize that Kenma hadn’t made a single sound the whole walk. He glanced down and saw Kenma lost in a haze of his own thoughts staring blankly at a dark screen.

“Kitten?” No response.

“Ken Ken?” Silence.

“Kenma!” Still nothing. With a pout hanging loosely on his face, Kuroo sped up his steps a little and came to a screeching halt directly in front of Kenma. Stunned by the sudden force he slammed into, a startled gasp slipped through his lips and Kenma started to fall backward. Eyes squeezed shut and arms stuck stiff to his side, Kenma tensed and braced for an impact...that didn’t come. With swift, almost catlike, reflexes one of Kuroo’s arms shot out to grasp hold of his shoulders while the other arm slid behind the small of Kenma’s back, pulling the small setter snug into his chest.

“Whoa there Kenma! You almost took a pretty bad fall there. Are you good?” Confused Kenma opened his eyes to see him not sprawled out on the pavement but tucked in the arms of Kuroo, his cautious eyes peering directly into his. A beat of silence passed through them as the pair stood on the sidewalk in each other's arms.  


“Kenma? Should I let go now?”

“Huh? Oh yeah..right.” Releasing his tight hold on Kenma, the captain placed the setter back on his feet, shifting on his own feet awkwardly. You could practically feel the tension in the air between them as they both tried to process exactly what had just transpired.

Kenma was not doing such a good job of that. If anything the almost slip and fall killed his train of thought further.

The small burst of disappointment when Kuroo let go shocked him greater than he was expecting. It was no secret that the two regularly shared warm embraces but there was something different about the way Kuroo held him that Kenma could not figure out for the life of him.

“Ah...should we get going kitten?” Kenma was once again pulled out of his own thoughts by Kuroo’s voice.

“Yes...yes let’s go.” After hearing Kenma’s confirmation, Kuroo reignited the one-sided conversation talking animatedly while Kenma tried to keep up, the events of the brief encounter weighing heavily on in his thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Kenma's train of thought. You will be dearly missed.


	3. A Bright Smile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More torture on poor Kenma and his refusal to accept his feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...
> 
> Let's pretend I wasn't gone for a whole month and I was capable of writing a story and doing school assignments at the same time. Cool? Cool
> 
> Without further ado, chapter 4
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

In all of his 17 years of living, Kenma never thought he would end up in this current mindset. The remainder of the walk was spent with Kenma feeling hopelessly and very confused and Kuroo being...well Kuroo. In almost no time at all they reached the gates of Nekoma High and stood in front of the entrance.

“Alright kitten this is where we separate. Ah I know you don’t wanna see me go who could?”

“I never said that-”

“Sure you did and i don’t blame you: I’m awesome.” A twitch of a smile teased its way on Kenma’s face that he quickly shot down as Kuroo turned to him eagerly.

“You’ll be alright right Kenma?” The setter gave a small nod in affirmation, making the lanky middle blocker beam. 

That smile. 

That damned smile that had been haunting his thoughts came back out to torture Kenma in the most innocent way possible.

He’s not even sure when that bright smile became such a noticeable feature to the setter but it was glaring in so many ways.

As if it wasn’t possible, the fire that had been pooling in Kenma’s heart got even hotter as the setter struggled to look away from the beautiful way Kuroo’s face opened up with such joy. It struck Kenma in so many ways and a part of him wanted to see that smile more.

He wanted to be the reason behind that smile and the urge was getting much harder to deny. 

Before he could open his mouth and say something that would truly embarrass himself, the school bell chimed and Kuroo’s head whipped up in shock.  
“Oh shit the bell! I’ll see you at practice alright kitten?!”

“I-” Before Kenma could begin to give him a response, Kuroo had run off in the direction of his classes, becoming nothing more than a blur in the bodies. Fragments of Kuroo’s radiating smile played itself on a loop in Kenma’s head and the setter couldn’t help but let a small smile slip its way onto his face despite the ever progressing turmoil in his head.

Now Kenma had assumed the worst was over. The morning’s incident seemed to be the furthest thing on Kuroo’s mind and his sudden want to be his main source of happiness had not left as big an impact like he originally thought.

How he wished he could take back those words now.  
.  
.  
.  
.

Dragging his tired aching feet out of his last class, he slowly made his way to the courtyard to wait for Kuroo to finish. Admittedly since he was focused on a particularly hard level in his game, he quickly lost awareness of what was going on around him allowing Kuroo to tower over him in silence.

“Kitten~” A deep low tone seemed to appear out of nowhere and startled Kenma so bad he jumped literal inches off the pavement. Catching himself again, he turned around in anger to see Kuroo doubled over, the shrieking hyena laugh resonating throughout his whole body. He was so utterly confused on how much impact it had on him and he hated it.

“BAHAHAHAHAHA OH MAN YOU SHOULD’VE SEEN YOUR FACE KEN KEN IT WAS PRICELESS!” Wiping the tears from his eyes, he straightened up and immediately his eyes went wide at the strange sight before him and went silent.

“This is the second time today I’ve seen you turn such a violent red and you never turn red and you never blush… are you alright Kenma?” Kenma jolted, Kuroo’s voice dragging him back down to earth.  
“Y-yes I’m fine Kuroo don’t worry. It’s just..yeah I’m fine-” A slick eyebrow shot up into his hair.

“You sure about that kitten?” Kenma nodded. Shrugging, Kuroo brought his arms into a stretch and laced his fingers snugly behind his head.

“Let’s get going to practice now yeah? Yaku’s gonna freak if we get there any later.” 

“O-okay.” With that Kuroo started heading in the direction of the gym with a joyful whistle leaving Kenma to hurry his speed and catch up with his stride  
.  
True to his word by the time the pair arrived at the gym, the rest of the team were doing drills and finishing up runs by the time Yaku descended on them, face full of fury.

“Do the two of you have any IDEA how LATE you are??? Practice started 30 MINUTUES AGO! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU TWO DOING??”

“We were-”

“Maybe Kenma was ~confessing~” All heads whipped towards the source the statement came from.

“What?”  
Yaku seemed mildly intrigued by this guess, Kuroo was stunned and Kenma was unreadable in the moment and the rest of the team was dead silent, watching everything from the sidelines.

“What makes you think that Lev?” He shrugged.

“I think it’s because I always see Kenma-san look at Kuroo in an odd way at times like in the locker room and during drills and-”

“Shut up Lev.” Heads once again whipped around and fell on the new source of sound still at the door. Kenma was looking straight into Lev, eyes burning holes into his skull.

“You’re as dumb as always.”

“Ken-”

Why would I ever look at Kuroo in such a way? How did your brain even come up with such an answer.” His voice was cold and quiet, encasing the gym in a silence none of them dared to break.  
Yaku stared at Kenma in surprise, Kuroo in a state of shock, Lev trembling in fear and the rest with slightly opened mouths.

After uttering this statement Kenma turned on his heel and walked right out of the gym. Jolting himself, Kuroo ran after him almost immediately leaving the gym in the same state of shock.

“Soooo...do we keep doing drills or can we leave?”

“LEV!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been gone for too long to only have 3 chapters up till this point and it's just SAD on my part. (3 months. 3 MONTHS. Smh) Now that I have a schedule for this month at least I feel like I should let whoever is reading this be aware.
> 
> I have a PSAT to take on the 25th (I'm just a fucking freshman idk if they do this in other schools but this is stressing me tf OUT) so as a result I've been practicing while trying to stay on top of my growing assignments.
> 
> BUT because of where I left this chapter off (hehe sorry by the way), I've writing chapter 4 right now and am sacrificing my sleep for this.
> 
> If you're still around and following this, thank you so very much for giving this story a chance. I hope it made you happy!


	4. Replay It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This deadass feels very rushed but I love it at the same time. Fuck being an overthinker this is annoying.
> 
> Be mindful for any errors for most of this was written at like 10 pm running on 6 hours of sleep.
> 
> If anything feels off in any way or the chapters aren't flowing right please tell me! I will take all the time needed to fix any mistakes.
> 
> Right well without any more dramatics, chapter 4~
> 
> Enjoy!

The thudding sound of Kenma’s shoes echoed through his head as he briskly walked through the still completely empty courtyard. He couldn’t believe what had just occurred just mere minutes before. His mind was suffocating, choking him with every useless detail he safely stored away about Kuroo over the years.

How he liked his coffee with 4 cups of milk, 2 tablespoons of sugar and a pinch of cinnamon strictly on Saturdays.

How often he had recited the periodic table 10 times going through his morning routine.

The type of order he would get depending on his outfit of the day and whatever accompanied him at the time.

Every and any detail Kuroo would’ve never thought twice of Kenma took them and held them dear to his heart without him even realizing so. He tried shaking them from his mind on several occasions but it only seemed to take deeper roots, clouding his once clear view of life. Now all he could see was Kuroo.

Day in and day out Kuroo was in his head, his scent surrounding him even in his own home.

Kuroo was everywhere he turned and he hated it.

He hated how hung up he got over a late night text that came out of nowhere.

He hated how much Kuroo’s laugh sent vibrations through his body, shaking him up.

He hated how much his smile never failed to make his day a bit brighter.

These were all the little things that Kuroo had done throughout their childhood every single breathing moment of their lives and he hated how much his mind noticed them now. He knew exactly why he was having these strong reactions to the very things he had grown up with.

He adamantly refuses to admit it.

It was too loaded with uncertainties and contained an answer he didn’t want to admit. After what seemed like hours of walking Kenma reached the gates of the school, its black iron structure looming over him holding up proud words that wrote “Nekoma High”. Just as he was about to walk through them, a rather loud voice suddenly came in earshot.

“KENMA WAIT!” Risking a glance behind him, Kenma’s eyes narrowed in on the one person in the world he was aching at the same time afraid to see at the moment.

“What do you want Kuroo.” Slowing down to a stop in front of the shorter man, Kuroo bent over, his chest heaving and coughing. 

“What was that back there kitten?” Kuroo coughed out, an expression of confusion fixated on his handsome features. Kenma stiffened, the familiar nickname only serving to elicit more internal reactions.

“It’s nothing.”

“Are you sure? It doesn’t seem like no-”

“I said it’s nothing Tetsurou.” The use of his first name shocked them both, Kenma’s features widening up before shutting back down. He watched Kuroo’s lips drop into a soft “o” shape and the movement somehow irritated the setter further. With the words still hanging in the air, he turned and walked through the entrance leaving a confused and stunned Kuroo in his wake.

The soft walk home gradually sped up into a brisk jog that turned into full blown running as his worn through sneakers thud against the the pavement, running as fast and as hard as he could away from the school and away from the one man that was trapped in his head. He ran until he couldn't breathe. He ran until his feet were sore and bruising. 

With every thud that hit the ground, Kenma could feel his anger slowly ebb away into nothing as he just let his feet take him on whatever path it trod on.

After what seemed like hours had blended together, Kenma slowed to a stop in front of a seemingly clear field with no person coming from any direction. He collapsed, vomit violently spewing from his mouth onto the fresh grass beneath his knees. Dragging his sleeve across his mouth, Kenma looked out at the rest of the quiet field, the golden rays of the sunset bathing the sky in a calming mix of pink and orange.

He found it sadly ironic how he could witness something so peaceful yet he felt like his life was descending into chaos. 

A chaos he realized he didn’t mind falling into.

As the sun faded from the sky and the stars started blinking into sight, memory clips of Kuroo came flooding back into his head and he replayed them all.

The satisfying way his sly smile that came out whenever he was teasing any human being he could irritate.

His sound of his hyena-like laugh that echoed through any vicinity whenever he heard anything slightly assuming.

The mesmerizing way that soft smile of his spread on his face whenever he was just...happy.

And he wanted to be the reason they happened. The reason for everything that made Kuroo feel happy.

After hours of silence he seemed to come to a conclusion and a smile came upon his face.

While he did end up running away from Kuroo initially, he finally allowed himself to admit the answer he had slowly confirmed for a while now.

He was in fact in love with Kuroo.


End file.
